Child Of God

2007-12-31T17:13:00.000+08:00

This blog will be permanently closed as of today

Moving on with life..

Never felt so defeated in life before..

2007-12-19T00:31:00.000+08:00

Hi again, just got back from my Da Jie's wedding. Happy for her man. =) Congrats again! (though i dont think u'll be reading my blog since u're busy) The food was great. Undeniably. Lol. 8 yrs of dating before marriage. Hmm.. The period just nice right? Actually don't really know. Then there are those who get marriage like after 1 year? Well.. Depends la right? Haha. I wonder how long will mine take before i get married.

Today was busy busy. Managed to pack my luggage. Cut my hair also. If i keep it any longer, I'll look like a lion la. So i decided to cut it. If not some of u will start bitching about it. Ok. Fine. Bitching is not a nice word. Lol. Talking.

Oh oh! Got story to tell. It's regarding this lady at the dinner table today. She's damn stupid. I think it's not nice to type it out here. So if u wanna know what happened, then u can ask me ya.

Well, i still cant believe I'm leaving tmr. =( I cant spend Christmas in Singapore. And it stinks.. Haiz.. Oh!! I just received a letter! =) Mum brought it in for me. Haha. I'll open it on Christmas. Though it's quite tempting to open it now. I'll bring it over to Korea so i can open it when it strikes 12 on Christmas day. Haha. To everyone out there, here's wishing u an advance MERRY CHRISTMAS!! I'll miss u guys loads! =)

this Christmas would be lonelier...

2007-12-17T11:22:00.000+08:00

Hello..

Am at Sam's house now. Waiting for Sam to wake up then can decide what in the world to do. -.- My phone died. =( And it sucks. Cuz i cant charge it here. Sam's house no nokia charger. Sorry if i cant reply u ya. Watched soccer last night with them (linus, daryl, leonad, sam). Not much of a soccer fan la. But Dora and Daryl were super sad last night. Lol. Awww.. It's not the end of the world k. IT'S JUST A GAME. Lol. So wad i said when we were at Cine was true la. Liverpool.. (Continue to rest yourself k?) Haha..

Flying off on Wed. Havent packed yet. Go home confirm kana scolded by parents for sure. Aiya. Then Tues night still got wedding to attend.

Went shopping the other day, bought quite a lot of stuff for the trip. And also for myself too. Lol.

Projects.. I hate projs.

This entry very random.. Wadever came to my mind, i just typed it down. Still tired.. Cant be bothered to type nice nice.. Slept quite late last night also. Going nuts already. I am sleep deprived. Really..

2007-12-11T18:16:00.000+08:00

Promise rings can mean:

"I will be faithful to you"
"I will return to you"
"I will keep a specific promise to you"
"I will keep your secret"
"I love you"
"My intention is to marry you, but I'm not yet ready to become engaged"
"I will save my virginity for you"
"We are best friends"
"I will always be there for you"
"You are my one and only Valentine"
"I promise to abstain from a vice (gambling, drinking, smoking)"
"I promise to replace this ring with a (larger) diamond one as soon as I can afford it"

Interesting right?

2007-12-09T23:43:00.000+08:00

With regards to your post on how superficial things turned out to be. I guess the only reason why i choose not to tell you is for the very reason that i dont want u, as my good friend, to be hurt. In fact, you were amongst the first few ppl whom i wanted to confide in especially during this "difficult" period. But everytime i find an opening to try to tell u, i look at how bothered u are with ministry, with school, with friends. I dont want this to be a burden to you.

Even during our meet on Fri and Sat, the awkward silence was quickly filled with how tied down u were at school and stuff. I also anticipated that it would be super awkward for me to tell u and then we'll stare at each other. I was afraid. I didnt know wad to expect if i told u. From the very first time u heard those rumours all the way till now, after hearing them, u get so frustrated. I am not stupid. I've always been sensitive to my surroundings. I knew right from the start that u werent "happy" about this entire thing. If u havent noticed that about me after all these years of friendship, then i havent got anything else to say. I never wanted to hide anything from you or from anyone. Now it seems like everyone knows about it. I can tell you right now that if u came up to me and asked me, i wouldnt have denied it. I would have told u the truth. But u didnt. Would that be considered lying then?

It's not that i dont trust you. It wasnt meant to be a secret from the start. I guess even if i told u who already knows about it, you would be shocked. Cuz the few of them kept it to themselves. Some, of course, came up to me and asked instead of gossiping.

Back then in the bus with Jocelyn, her qns to me was "am i attached". The truth is, I am not. But if u choose to infer that i am hiding something then i have nothing to say. What turned out to be a few ppl knowing led to the whole world spreading false statements.

Back to you. I have always been there for u when u needed someone to talk to. I heard your stories of your friends and their relationship problems and how u were involved in it. How u got hurt at the end of it. How can i neglect what happened in the past by telling u this? Like i said and will say it again, i never intended to hide this entire thing. If ppl were to come up to me and ask me, i'd gladly tell them. I never said i wouldnt tell you. You never asked but chose to blame it on me.

2007-11-30T23:32:00.000+08:00

Ok.. I'm feeling super bad now. Today isnt my day. What i thought was the best day turned out.. wrong.. I'm pissed.. Hate that i'm such an idiot la. Freak..

Got nothing else to say other then to blame it on my stupidity and forgetfulness. Damn. Lance, u should be killed.. I hope i didnt like totally ruin your day. Feeling super shitty about it la. DAMMIT!

Stupid.. I so hate myself. How could i ever have forgotten! When i specifically mentioned it. Gosh.. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! Someone shoot me la. PISSED at myself la!

2007-11-22T21:45:00.000+08:00

Today is so not my day. Ok. Fine. So i had a bad day. Stupid legs of mine. I HATE THEM! Useless. If it werent for them, i wouldnt have fell. I'm so pissed. Here's what happened. Today was my NAPFA. First station, Sit-ups. Still can make it. Managed a 50. Then came freaking shuttle run. Started running, grabbed the first wooden block, turned around, wanted to race back, lost balance, thinkin i could regain back balance, i sped up. Then BOOM!! Fell! My whole knee is like covered with blood. Here's a pic of how it looks like.

it does look the shape of a heart

This is like the 2ND time this year i fell la! I'm so frustrated! And it's the left side somemore!!! Then it was pull ups. Still not too bad. Managed a 5. Then comes standing broad jump! How to jump when my knee feels like it's gonna snap into 2 if i exert too much force!? 190 plus. FAIL!! Was too demoralised to continue after that station. See no point. I am disappointed.. Really..

I didnt do well.. Thanks for the encouragement though. =) And dont worry, things will work out fine ya.

2007-11-17T12:39:00.000+08:00

Booyah! Lol.

Am in school now. Doing proj. Boring AFA. Sheesh. We decided to.. Erhem.. Now sitting at the underpass. Attempting to do some work. But apparently.. To no avail. It's super noisy here. TELL YOU.. Today is gonna be super busy day. After this, still need to go down to Church for skit prac. Then 4pm got YAM. But. I think i might have to leave early cuz of band prac at 5pm. Everything clash sia.. Better get back to doing proj. Bernard staring at me already. Lol.

Oh ya! SORRY MAY MAY & STEPH! Kk. I officially apologise leh. For those of u who dont know wad i'm talking about. I didnt thank them for wishing me happy birthday. Lol. (So long ago.. dot dot) HAHA! jokin yea.

Anyway, i really had better go back to doing my work. Bye!
Welcome back gal. =)

Missing you..

2007-11-14T08:08:00.000+08:00

It's Wed morning! I'm up early to check if lecture notes are posted up or not. I know.. It's a bit late. But haha! Better late then never? OK. Shall post again later or something. Go print notes now. Bye!
i know u're going today. As cliche as it sounds. You're being missed already . The next few days would be.. lonely? Anyway, u go enjoy yourself ya. It is your well deserved break. After doing well for your finals. =) Promise me you'll take care of yourself ya? Will be waiting for u to tell me about your trip. LOLx.
P.S. Die.. No notes.. No need to go lecture? HAHA!

Swear it Again - Westlife

2007-11-12T19:45:00.000+08:00

I wanna know
who ever told you I was letting go
of the only joy that I have ever known
girl, they're lying

just look around
and all of the people that we used to know
have just given up, they wanna let it go
but we're still trying

so you should know this love we share was never made to die
I'm glad we're on this one way street just you and I, just you and I

I'm never gonna say goodbye
cuz I never wanna see you cry
I swore to you my love would remain
and I swear it all over again and I
I'm never gonna treat you bad
cuz I never wanna see you sad
I swore to share your joy and your pain
and I swear it all over again all over again

Some people say
that everything has got its place in time
even the day must give way to the night
but I'm not buying

Cause in your eyes
I see a love that burns eternally
and if you see how beautiful you are to me
you'll know I'm not lying

sure there'll be times we wanna say goodbye but even if we try
there are something's in this life won't be denied won't be denied

The more I know of you, is the more I know I love you,
and the more that I'm sure I want you forever
and ever more and the more that you love me,
the more that I know
oh that I'm never gonna let you go gotta let you know that I..

2007-11-02T23:21:00.000+08:00

HELLO PEEPS!

IT'S MY BIRTHDAY TODAY!

ok.. you must be thinking..

Lance.. We know..

I'm 19th. My grandparents say i'm old already. So sad right? He insist that i'm 91.

Thank u everyone who wished me HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

The strangest people wished me. Long lost friends. It was kinda weird. Maybe i should just type out all those who wished me and how they did it. Here goes..

YOU were the first. It meant alot to me. =)

Then Mummy and Sis walked into my room and wished me.

Followed by Jordan, Jocelyn, GAN MEI

Boss called me at 12.15am? So funny! She called but i din pick up the phone initially.

Then i woke up to tons of smses..

Daddy, Godpa, Aunt Angeline, Syaz, Bernard, Corrine, Jerine

KIMMY NEUTRON! (All the way from Shanghai!) - Dont know if u got my sms though

Loon Fa-mar-lie. Thanks cousin! (This one also a bit random.. LOLX!)

Uncle Desmond, Aunt LeeLiang

Geraldine, Natalie Mok, Gerald, Eudora, Terence, FLO, Linus, Ming Bao, Jian Horng

Nicholas, Nathaniel - they found out halfway during BS. LOLX!!

Cindy (pri sch friend! super long never talk already. Was shocked she msged me)

Aunt Janet, Uncle TeckWei, Natasha, Charles, Esther, YiLi, YiLing

Daryl Seah (Another random one. HAha. Friend from sec sch!)

BJ, Mikh and YiEn called me at 11.02pm. So funny.

Checked my blog, facebook and friendster and saw Vera and Lynn's tag to me. Lian Sie sent me a bunny on facebook. Shawn Quek too. Aunt Marilyn and Nicole Wong on friendster.

Wei Sheng, MING, Deborah

Oh oh. Daryl Chew, Serene, Alicia and Nicole Yeo wished me in advance.

Thanks once again to everyone who remembered my birthday and wished me ya. =)

I hope i din leave out anyone! Anyway, i think it's running a bit late. Will blog again ya.

Night everyone!

2007-10-31T20:50:00.000+08:00

Hey guys,

Hmmm.. Actually i dont really know wad to blog about today. School was ok. Had Audit tutorial today. And before that i had AFA Lecture. Cashflow cashflow. Hopefully i'll remember wad he said. Anyway, school ended early today. Slightly earlier. Suppose to end at 1. Anyway, msged her.

Received this birthday card from Yamaha. Nothing much inside also. Speaking of cards. I cant wait to receive my proper driving license. Oh oh. I was kinda jealous today when i saw this tutorial mate of mine driving off in this mercedes benz after lesson! Man.. >.< I also wanna have a car. Boss' dad got her new car already. On Tues.

Anyway, am suppose to take my SATs this sat, 3rd Nov, with Terence but i withdrew from it. Firstly, i dont have the time to study for it. Next, it would be a total waste of time and money. Besides.. It's the day after my day.

I'm glad things are cleared between us. There are a lot more things i wanna know and wanna tell you. As for my birthday wish. I guess you would have already known.

2007-10-24T22:01:00.000+08:00

Haha.. This is random but. Hey.. This is my 50th post. I know i know.. Had this blog since 2005 and by right, if i just blog once a week, i should have like 168 entries at least. And if i were to blog everyday, it'll add up to 1095 entries. So.. 50.. yea.. I get the point.

School was aight today. Just completed all my tutorials for this week. So now here i am blogging. Dont really know wad to blog abt though. Was just blog surfing. And yea. I read it.

I was just asked this question today. How come secular music can be "harmful" to the Christian soul. And my reply was.. Because we're living in this time and age, music is everywhere. So accessible. We like songs because of the tune, the tempo, the lyrics, n more importantly, because we can actually relate to the song. The song seems to be able to express how we feel at that particular moment. LOVE. jealousy. hate. SUICIDE. I guess that's when it's harmful cuz sometimes we unknowingly do something stupid. Trust me, ppl do get psychoed by songs. Yea..

Well, i dont know exactly what is going through your mind, but u sure wont wanna look into mine. Wait or not. Will things be any different? I sure hope so. For the better of course. I hope telling u didnt make things awkward between us. Cause somehow i feel the distance already. What if.. Just what if.. You were to walk out on me? Dont get me wrong. Im not desperate.

2007-10-23T19:20:00.000+08:00

Hey everyone, thanks for being so supportive when i was down yall. I can officially say i got my license on 16th Oct 2007. (Happy B'day to u YiLing) This is totally great man. Haha. Managed to drive around in my parent's car on quite a few occasions within that week itself. And yes yes. I havent forgotten that i am suppose to drive u guys out. JIALAT. Was just running through the no. of ppl whom i'm suppose to "chaffeur" around in my mind.. CAN DIE.. So many ppl..

Anyway, Youth Sunday just past. Had an enjoyable time playing with my band. GREAT JOB KUAY BONG! Sadly, i will be moving on to coach another group of people. Well.. I guess there really isnt anything else i can do can i? Unless my band goes on a strike or something. Then again, it might be a good thing for them. A new change, let them adapt to Ming's style. So, all the best ya. Will miss you guys. =)

Went for PEP G yesterday. Msg was on "Using Music to share the Gospel". Thought the msg was pretty good. Considering that we are going to have something like this as one of our events next year. Hopefully i am able to share with the rest of the people what i have learnt from the talk. It lasted till pretty late and i thank someone for keeping me awake throughout my journey home. Hahaa.

You know, life really is very unpredictable. Just last week, Ps KS spoke on uncertainties. Spoke of the end times. It's really easy for us to say, yea, we ought to live everyday in view that tmr "will be the day" or that we ought to be "thinking" Christians, to be on a constant look out for our loved ones. But, just how many of us are doing that? This world we're living in is so sinful. Hatred.. Lies.. Money.. Many times i cant help but think that God's standards, for one, they aren't unreasonable, but they really are a challenge. Take for instance, love your enemy. Simple commandments, yet so hard to achieve. Arent u scared that if God were to really come tmr and then ask u, "Lance, have u done what i've told you to do?" I tell u ppl, i think i might go to hell. I have faith. I believe there is a God. I know there is One God. I love that God, I have experienced that God in my life. But is that enough? I wanna be God's FAITHFUL SERVANT.

School started on 15th Oct. Something tells me it wont be that easy this coming semester. Feeling quite uneasy about it. Dont know why either. See.. Uncertainties again.. Well, only time will tell. Speaking of which..

Well, when u asked me those questions, it seemed so hard to translate it to words. There were so many things i would have said to you. But it just didnt come out right. I guess time will really tell whether anything will happen. But i'll wait. If it takes a year, if it takes 3 years, I'll wait. I really dont know why i am that willing/patient to wait. Maybe cuz i have been waiting all these while for you to come.

2007-10-12T16:19:00.000+08:00

This is seriously getting on my nerves. I hate it that the people around me are so SELF CENTRED! WTH! Notice i mentioned PEOPLE! So i dont mean just one! Gosh, what is wrong with you all!? You vent your anger on us innocent people and u expect us to empathize with you. WTH!? Go get a life! Does anyone care about ME!? MY PROBLEMS!?

Today was a HORRIBLE. Thanks to the contribution of some ARSE. SUE ME. Firstly, driving. Totally screwed up. WTH. The freaking test is next Tues and i am still making so many mistakes. I am so expecting myself to fail. I don't even have the mood to bother about that ANYMORE. I ALSO GIVE UP! So much NEGATIVITY around me.

Next, i didnt enjoy my freaking lunch AT ALL! Some MORON happened to have WAITED FOR TOO LONG. Like HOW IN THE WOLRD AM I TO KNOW U WAITED FOR ME!? This is what happened. Called Simin up and she asked if i wanted to have lunch with her and she asked me to TAKE MY TIME. SO I DID. Simin didnt mention that there were 2 other ppl joining us. She also asked for a favour. To help her WITHDRAW $50 for her and she'll return me another day. FINE. I did it. Waited for the freaking bus 33 for a FULL 20MINS to come. My fault is it!? Show me your stupid face for what!? I control the bus har!? Idiot. And then i reached NUS to see this bitches' face all black. WTH!?? And mind u, u dont know the whole story, dont show your bloody face ok! I dont owe u anything! I din even know u were there WAITING FOR ME AND SIMIN! Wait for bus, draw money, walk to your freakin sch, ALL NEED TIME ONE RIGHT!?

I hope u freaking read this! I hate to see your face everytime i happen to see u. It IRRITATES the shit out of me. It IRKS me! As though i killed your freaking parents or something! Trust me, if it wasnt for Simin who asked me to drop the topic, if someone had passed me a gun there and then, i would have shot u in the head with a gun or better still, you would have seen my tray flying towards your freaking direction. TRUST ME! What is wrong with you people.

Stupid. GET IT!? STUPID!

2007-09-23T17:59:00.000+08:00

I'm utterly disappointed in you

...

I havent got anything else to say

I guess it's really time for me to move on.. I will miss u

2007-09-12T19:53:00.001+08:00

To enlarge the pic, just click on it. It should work. It SHOULD. Lol

Hello people,

Erm. As some of you would have known already. I'm helping Bethany Presbyterian with this event called "Philos". Basically it's a follow-up event on this evangelistic event quite a few weeks back. It's like a garage band kinda thingy. Both me and BJ will be singing la. And we're allowed to invite our church youths over. So if u would wanna come, it's actually this coming Sat, 15th Sept, 2pm to 4.30pm. Over at Bethany Presbyterian Church. Do tell me if u'll be going ya, then i can give u the details on how to get there and also tell u who else will be going. Lol.

2007-08-29T23:41:00.000+08:00

Hello everyone! Just went out with my BFF Kim yesterday! Man.. It's been a very long time since i pampered myself with GOOD FOOD sia. Here are some of the pics we took using Kim's cam. Dont drool ya. LOLX. >.<

Manhattan Seafood Platter at Manhatta Fish Market!

That was lunch. It was quite a big portion. Very very nice. The next time i go there. I'll have that again! Haha. Then we went to Starbucks to chill for like.. an hour and a half or so. Waited for the movie to start. At the mean time, we went to shop also la. Well.. She did most of the shopping cuz she's flying off thurs night to Shanghai for attachment. Am gonna miss u ya! Update your blog! *Lance secretly pops champagne* LOL

Had my usual. Mocha Frappucino >.<

We went to watch "The Simpsons Movie". Wasnt that fantastic la. I thought "Rush Hour 3" was seriously better. Funnier too. But.. Well.. Wadever. Anyway, we then decided to go to Billy Bombers. After that, we went for dessert at Changing Appetites. HAHA. We really ate a lot man! It tell u. The chocolate ice-cream was so nice. Darn. I so wanna go back there to eat soon!

Mixed Grill = Ham, Bacon, Beef, Chicken.. HEAVEN!

Chocolate Chocolate Chocolate Chocolate...........

We finally left the place at like. 9 plus? Took 111 back with Kimmy Neutron. Went home to be greeted with something new. It was a new addition to the family. Ya. If you're smart enough, it's a pet dog. Actually temporarily only la. My Godpa bought this Chihuahua and couldnt bring it home first. So he had to dump it at our place for about a month or so. Will blog about it soon. It's so small! If i'd kicked it. It'll definitely fly out the window! Haha.. I said.. IF.. Dont stare at me like that. Anyway, that's it for tonight!

2007-08-21T19:55:00.000+08:00

Read wad everyone has to say. For one, I never did mention that I doubted God's creation or anything to that extent. As a matter of fact, I do acknowledge that God made me the way I am and I also know that no one is made perfect as we're all sinners. I am just disappointed in myself for not being able to use the talents that the Lord has blessed me with to the best of my abilities. I am not criticising the works of the Lord but I guess sometimes it really can’t be helped when u see your fellow peers climbing faster than u, it makes u feel. Inadequate. Insufficient. Defective. I think "putting down" God's creation is too heavy a word to use. It's more of the "I don’t see myself doing something more for the Lord as God's creation".

Next, speaking of bolstering my self-confidence. How about, I don’t even have any to start with? I've always thought that playing the piano was my forte. Never knew how one sentence made by her could really tear you down completely. If you still don’t know who I’m talking about, it's my piano teacher. With that pillar I always thought I could rely on down, I guess there really isn’t anything else to bolster my confidence now is there? I knew I was never very good with my studies and piano was my backup. Now u tell me, how to even bolster my confidence when my only backup has been crushed by my own teacher? I would need to rely on that for a living in the future!

As much as we can say we wanna trust that the Lord will provide, will God rain down the basic necessities for me? We still need to do something for ourselves first right? It's the same as, praying and committing your grades and exam to the Lord, u don’t just sit there and watch TV all day and on the day of the exam itself, pray that the Lord will give you straight As? To me, this isn’t a mere useless certificate, it's something which I need to rely on. I'm disappointed that the teaching diploma WASNT even OFFERED to me! There she was telling me how impressed she was with Lynn. She then told me how hardworking she is and later on mentioned about her other students, telling me that they are quick readers. What's that suppose to mean? That I’m slow? What is the underlying meaning? That I’m lousy, not good enough!? Is that why my friend who joined you at a later time gets to take the diploma earlier than me? Lynn was given an opportunity to play in her concert when I’m not. How am I supposed to feel? Happy? Filled with exuberance? Ya. I'm happy for Lynn. I'm glad she made it that far. But for goodness sake. I'm human too aren’t I!? I've got feelings too!!

Talking about how to use God's gift to amplify His love. Isn’t it a contradiction? My piano teacher is a fellow SISTER-IN-CHRIST. Ya. I guess that is a great way of sharing God's love. Helping to bolster other people's confidence by tearing that person down first. Sadly, not everyone recovers from such heavy falls. If u can, good for you. If u can't, you'll end up like me. Thinking to yourself, how to prove your worth. Thinking about how else u can amplify His love with my gifts. That is IF I can find anything else.

Now diverting everyone's attention back to the purpose of this entry. I'm not trying to get back at any of you. Like I said, this is my only way I can share how I feel. I am thankful that I have such loving and caring friends like you all. I am just disappointed with myself. I just need sometime to find myself again in this mess. If you have been reading my past entries, I guess I need your prayers.

Lynn, Daryl, Deborah - I really really appreciate the time u took to type out that whole chuck of encouraging words. Thank you for those constant encouragements

Yien, Simin, Kenneth, Dora, Joy, Grace, Vera, Ming - Thank you for offering me your shoulders and listening ears. Thanks for showing your concern. I'm grateful that you care.

2007-08-20T18:30:00.000+08:00

Just came back from piano lesson. Sometimes long train rides can be quite a good thing. Good for u to ponder over your life. How fruitful it has been.. Or how sucky it has been, like in my case. Was just thinking about the things I could and couldn’t do.

Let’s look at the number of “I Can’t”s in my life

I can’t pray a prayer without fumbling over my words
I can’t sing as well as my other guy peers
I can’t play the piano well enough to take a teaching diploma
I can’t do anything without being stressed at the end of it
I can’t even lend a listening ear to my friends in need
I can’t keep a promise without breaking it
I can’t keep this family together
I can’t decide what I wanna do with my life
I can’t score a grade favourable enough for me to enter uni
I can’t get the work I’m tasked to do done on time
I can’t gather up enough courage to tell someone something
I can’t not cause someone to stumble somehow
I can’t help but be depressed whenever things don’t work out
I can’t drive a damn car without mounting the damn curb
I can’t do something and stay committed to doing it
I can’t lead a group of youths without thinking that I’m incapable of doing so
I can’t be there for a friend when her life is screwed (what a coincidence)
I can’t help being too sensitive, emo, whatever u call it
I can’t complete a sentence without any grammatical errors
I can’t be an encouragement to anyone when they need it most
I can’t make a decision I won’t regret later
I can’t discipline myself to do QT every night
I can’t be that faithful friend because of all my flaws
I can’t help but feel useless
I can’t help thinking that all hope is lost
I can’t control the hurt I’m feeling when I look at this long list of “I Can’t”s in my life

If I were to continue, it’ll go on forever. Try to be positive u say. Ok. I’ll try.. Well then, now let’s look at the things I can do.

…

Nothing.

I’m not surprised.. Trust me, it was way easier typing out the “I Can’t”s than the “I Can”s.

I guess, I am trying pretty hard to blend in with the rest of my peers with all the flaws in my life. Cant help but to feel that I really am of no use to society. Seriously, tell me something I am good at and I’ll applaud u.

I can’t help being negative. I guess it’s who I am, I’m person who thinks a lot when I am alone. I guess if u put me in a room alone, I’ll most prob drive myself insane. Maybe it's not a bad think if i just silenced myself from the world.

2007-08-19T20:53:00.000+08:00

Ello.. Blogging after a long long time again. Before i start, i just wanna say that this entry is gonna be emo.. So if u cant tahan me being emo, just.. go visit another web page or something.

Anyway, i realised this is the only avenue i have to rant on and on without ppl getting irritated with me at the end of it. Well, at least i dont think so. Just came back from "Philos" band prac at Bethany Presby. Am their vocalist for a few songs. And i came to a realisation that i sound horrible. Come to think of it. I never did sound nice. Vocally that is. I always thought that i sing ok. But the more i start listening to myself, the more i realise that i dont sound nice at all. It's damn sad. Then i start to wonder. And i came to a conclusion that i suck at every other thing u can think of. Here's a list of things i will never match up to any of my other peers.

Vocals
Studies
Spiritually
Musically
Speech
Fashion
Keeping secrets
Being there for a friend

These are but what i can think of off hand. I've really started to wonder what in the world am i good at. And whenever i "think" i am good at something, i am also reminded of someone who can do that thing better than me. Depressing eh? Haiz.. Maybe i suck. What is my gift? I cant minister to others like how my peers can, and worst of all, i dont even think i am a reliable friend. I've recently let slip a secret which i kinda promised i would never tell anyone. And now that friend came to know of it. And i cant help but feel really bad about it. Even till today. I dont dare face that friend..

I guess it all boils down to me sucking in everything. Lance, you just suck. U are horrible in everything. I feel damn loser. Seriously..

Coincidence?

2007-05-27T22:59:00.000+08:00

Hi people. Here i am blogging again. It's been a tough week. Hopefully the coming week will be a better one. Well.. At least there's a public holiday to look forward to. I'm bothered with some thing.. And this thing has been "Ka Jiao-ing" me a lot lately. I thought of going into full time before but this thought basically just comes and go. Never really took it into consideration. And today, (It had to be today, of all days), Elder Yoke Fooi came up to me while i was heading to collect 2 baos for my bro Daryl and myself and he told me something i'd never expect to hear from him. What more at my age.. The thing was, he came up and told me this, "Lance, i've been praying for you." And i was like. Oh dear.. Wad in the world did i do or shared with him before which required him to pray for me.. And then he carried on by saying. "I think you should consider serving full time." And i was.. You know.. Being Lance.. But with the shocked face. Didnt know how to handle the situation back then.. I was like.. Errr.. Ok.. Will continue praying about it. And uncle YF asked me to not pray for God to show me a confirmation but more for me to pray to God for Him to challenge me to go into full time ministry.

Didnt really have much guts to bring it up during core meeting. But i vaguely talked about it during our meal before core meeting with Daryl and Rachel la. So anyway, after meeting ended, Joyce asked if i was free to go for a drink and i agreed to it. I had quite a few things i needed to share with her since she is my jie and the only one whom i can go to whenever i am troubled. So we headed down to Raffles City Shopping centre together with Ah Bao to eat at "Ding Tai Fung". Man.. The portion was like.. miserable la. But that's beside the point. Kinda shared with them the same thing too. And expected wad sort of answer i would get from them. So ya. So when it was about time. We decided to head home. Joyce then proceeded to meet Ps. Kien Seng and a few others to go for the GDOP. (Sorry i couldn't go) Had to go to my gramp's house for dinner.

Went home. Told my parents about it. They werent the most excited people on earth. Can see from their faces. They told me that ultimately it's my choice. Cant help it sometimes when parents hope for their child to earn big bucks in the future. Was quite discouraged. While we were walking to my gramps' house. My dad was telling me that it was the people who told me i should consider full time and not God. So i humbly accepted that fact. But here comes to shocking bit. During dinner. My grandma, who hasnt received Christ yet but comes to church occasionally, told everyone at the table that she had a dream last night. And.. She dreamt that next time, I would be a pastor. The moment she completed her sentence, you can practically see the shock in everyone's face at the table then.. Well.. I didnt know how to react. Coincidence? 2 occurrence in the same day?

I guess the thing is really for me to pray. And maybe you guys can help keep me in prayer too? Kinda lost. No idea wad my future holds. So ya..

2007-05-13T23:42:00.000+08:00

Ello again. It's a Sunday. And Sundays are usually my favourite days. No idea why. Suppose you must be thinking i'm crazy or something. But ya. And it's Mother's Day today. =) Celebrated it with my family and grandparents at the hawker centre.. Lol.. Ate "Zi Char" there.. Yaya.. I know.. the only reason why we ate there was cuz my sister still had her exams going on.. So ya.. The actual celebration was last week. We went to this indian restaurant to eat. The food was pretty ok. And man.. It's no wonder why they have such big tummies.. The amount of oil in every dish is.. crazy.. Okok. I shall not speak further on this topic. Cuz i dont want some people to call me.. Errhmm.. You know who you are.. Lol.. Ya.. Actually i have nothing much to talk about tonight. Other then the fact that i am dreading work tmr. Well.. I suppose life has to go on still. And i've 3 months of intership left. I cant wait to go back to school! So.. I'll try to post more often la. If time permits. Well then. Till next time!

2007-05-07T22:57:00.000+08:00

Hello people. Yes. I know i havent been blogging in like ages. Cant help.. Work is Crazy.. I practically have no life. I only look forward to the weekends. I really need a break. Darn.. I totally hate the school. It's not bad enough that we have to work overtime almost everyday and there they have to make us do some stupid multimedia report. And the date line is so tight! What is wrong with them? Ok fine. I'll stop complaining.

Going to watch spiderman with my ex-DG this coming sat. Heard loads of comments on the show. I can finally watch it and critic it too! Lolx.. Sounds stupid. Ok. Fine. Well.. I think that's it for today. Dead tired. Turning in now. Night peeps!

2007-02-22T22:19:00.000+08:00

Ello.. I know it's been a long time since i last blogged.. Yea.. Been pretty busy and still am.. Exams just passed, then new year came and went. And now i'm on attachment. Yea.. PriceWaterhouseCoopers (PwC). Yes, it's an auditing firm. One of the big 4 auditing firms in Singapore. Haha.. It still hasnt sink in to me yet that i am in year 3 already. Results will be out on the 14th of Mar. Scared to the core. Seriously have no idea how i'll do. I'll just hope for the best.

I think lately there's been a lot of fear in me. Seriously have no idea why. Exams and work especially. As much as i am excited about getting into PwC and being there for 2 days already, i still get the jitters.. No idea why.. There's still this amount of uncertainty? Aiya.. Dont know la. Maybe it's just that i havent settled down. So my prayer request is most probably that.

update on grandma ...

2006-09-28T00:14:00.000+08:00

Hi people, here’s an update on my grandmother. It's been about a week since she's been down with this facial muscle disorder known as "Bell's Palsy". She is still having difficulties accepting it but I thank God that He has been working in her life through this.

My family got together on a Sunday and asked for her permission to allow us to pray for her. Being a staunch Buddhist, or so she claims, she has never liked the idea of us praying for her or anything to that extent. But to our pleasant surprise, she didn’t utter a single word of disagreement but instead allowed us to pray for her. God was definitely at work. The day after, I went down to visit her. Managed to chat with her quite a bit and understand the situation she is in and told her that a few people in church might be coming down to visit her. Then she mentioned something which I never thought I’d hear from her. She said, "You all Christians very caring hor... Maybe one day I’ll become one too." Imagine the joy I was feeling at that point of time. I never expected her to say those words. Then just a few days later, when we went over to my gramp's house for dinner and just before we were about to leave, managed to talk to her again. Told her that we'll be keeping her in prayer, also mentioned that my church's youth group prayed for her too. Soon after I told her all those, she said something like, "When I recover, I’ll consider going to church and thank God." Btw, she can speak fluent English. Ya.

Through all these, I could really see that God is really playing a major role in this area. My prayers night after night has been for the salvation of my grandparents. For almost 6 years, I’ve been praying for them and the Lord finally opened up this opportunity for us to share about God's love, grace and mercy to her. I came to see that though at times things may not happen the way you want it to. God has something planned behind all those trials. And behind every trial comes an important lesson He wants us to learn from. We might not be able to go through it alone, and that's where our brothers and sisters in Christ come in, to walk along side you, with God watching over us. Did my quiet time today and it happen to be in relations to helping one another.

Galatians 6:2 says, "Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."

I think we ought to do so because in our walk with God, there's definitely going to be ups and downs, and showing our care and concern to our fellow bros and sis might seem like a small thing but the one whose burden is being shared would feel the acceptance and love of others. And would continue walking through this difficult time in light that God is still there. I really like to thank God for placing all these bros and sis is Christ in my life and for them to constantly encourage and remind me that God has never left me. I really appreciate it. Thank you so much.

cheer up lance (:
-ciA*

spiritual high?

2006-09-26T00:55:00.000+08:00

I am starting to doubt myself again. Was it an act of impulse? Or was it genuinely from God? Did I really hear what God had to say to me or was it simply a cry from my heart? After having to hear what you said, I really thought to myself, did I take up this role because I really wanted to serve Him? And that I saw a need to be laborer in the harvest field? Or... it was because I am on a spiritual high. I thought the many nights of praying and listening to your word and what you had to say was enough. And that I clearly heard your voice telling me, "Go out there into the harvest field, and reap what I've sown". I thought I saw the need to go out there and make disciples. The world out there is dying and I want to do something about it and not just sit here and wait for that day to come. I doubt it would be a lovely sight. I understand that you are concern about my well being and I truly understand where you are coming from, and I thank God for a sister like you. The thing is... What am I to do now? Pray? What if what I hear again is not from God but myself again, being on spiritual high? This is bad. I thought I had the answer. Now I seem to have lost it all. Lord, can you hear my heart crying out to you? I told to myself, I had to major in majors and minor in minors, which meant I had to let go of things which I enjoy doing even though, given a choice, I’d like to continue. But those are things people out there are able to handle. Just that no one is taking the initiative to do it. Not that I’ll give it up completely, but I’ll give the church ample notice for them to source for new people and I’ll only stop when my term is up. You are right in that I have a lot of things on my plate. But if it really is God's calling, should I not follow what he has planned for me? I'm confused now. I'm lost. I have no answers to any of the questions I posted. It's not your fault, it's not anybody's fault. It's mine. I have only myself to blame. For not praying hard enough and searching deep enough.

Prayer Request

2006-09-17T23:40:00.000+08:00

Hi guys, will try to keep this post short. It's a prayer request this time. My grandma has been diagnosed with this disease called "Bell's Palsy". Its a condition that causes the facial muscles to weaken or become paralyzed. She happened to wake up on sat morning to find her right side of her face sagging. She refused to go to the doctor till later at night when my grandpa secretly called up my parents, who later notified the rest of my family of my grandma's condition. And it was then when they sent her to the hospital. My grandma was told by this young doctor that it could be a mild stroke which made her heart drop la.. But it was later confirmed but an experienced doctor that it wasn't. Sense of relieve. While my parents and relatives were at the hospital, me and my sister were at home praying for her, that everything will be fine.

My prayer would be for her to completely recover from this illness. She is really very down that half her face looks disfigured. She is a non-christian. We went over to my gramps' house today to visit her. My family sat down with my grandma and we offered to pray for her. For the first time, she actually agreed. Praise the Lord. We then took turns to pray for her. So ya, continue to pray for her salvation. Will keep you all updated. Thanks

When is my time to go?

2006-09-04T00:56:00.000+08:00

Emo kid.. That's what I’ve been called since.. a very long time ago? Maybe I am being emotional.. Maybe I’m just too sensitive.. to the extend where I feel.. out of place.. out of this world.. Stranger in the world? Ya.. Same thing applies to the church. Man.. Even reading whatever I just typed makes me feel that I’m being emo too.. Sighs..

Whatever happened to building people up? Maybe its cause I’ve been the laughingstock all my life, so much so that the people around hardly even take to heart that I’ve got feelings too? The feeling of trying too hard to fit in came back again.. Time and time again I’ll remind myself that they did not mean harm, and I’ll continue living this miserable and forlorn life of mine as though nothing happened, as though it was just a passing phase of my life..

I guess I’m being emo again.. I've concluded that it’s just me. Always took things too seriously.. when others claim that they were joking only. Life sucks.. I have serious issues with everyone. Maybe I’m meant to be a loner.. born freak.. a weirdo who laughs like an idiot.. Come to think of it.. I really need to retreat.. Somewhere far away.. You know.. Leave this place.. Escapism.. Than to remain here where your ego gets crushed.. No pride.. Never given credit in anything you do.. Get yelled at when things don’t go their way.. Go through loads of shit just to get something done.. Maybe I need to get a life.. How ironic..

No friends, being laughed at, pushed around, having to do shit, insulted and ridiculed by people, being the butt of the joke.. Sick and tired of this world.. Sick of living..

i'm the gan kor kor, u're the gan mei mei!

2006-08-30T21:41:00.000+08:00

Gosh.. Today had to go school at 10 till 11 for this briefing on the "national accounting quiz" thingy.. Suppose to meet Jocelyn at 11 to make our way down to Zenitant to sign up for more trails but then the briefing lasted longer then an hour la.. I had no choice but to leave early. Told my classmates that i'll join them later into the day. Met Joce in school and we took a bus down to our destination. Reached the place and spoke to this woman with long, curly hair. Told her that we were there to sign up for trails, she passed us the damn file and never said anything.. We stupidly flipped through the entire file just to find that everything was filled already and there was no extra "vacancy", so to say. I walked up to that bitch and asked if there is any space left and whether it meant that we couldnt sign up for any trails and that was when we said "i'm sorry, yesterday a bunch of people came and signed up for the trails". At that freakin point of time, i seriously wanted to punch her in the face man.. WHY COULDNT SHE TELL US EARLIER? Then to let us flip through the entire file in vain! We walked out of the freakin place bitching about how stupid and dumb she was.

Smsed my friends and found out that they were still at the bukit batok driving centre or something and required like another 45 mins to reach Orchard. So me and joce decided to kill time and walk all the way to Tiong, cause she had to meet her mum for lunch. We chatted along the way there, talked rubbish la. Then we talked about havin to suddenly talk to a headless person as we were walking along the pavement beside the main road. So funny la. Anyway, we reached there and she went to check out the yoga class. Ya, she plans to sign up for yoga classes. Along with her mum i think. After that we walked around a bit and then nuah-ed at macs, to wait for her mum. Then i received another sms from my mates saying that they wont reach till dunno what time la.. So i told them i'll grab something to eat. I ended up eating with Joce and her mum, auntie Lily. While having lunch, called Kim and told her about what happened and she told me i should have written down my name even though there was no space as Zenitant needed people with experience and not newbies. I also happen to notice that my name wasn't written down for the camp facil thingy. At that point of time, i just hacked la, didnt really bother much. After finishing my Katsu Don, we headed to the MRT and went our separate ways.

It was so coincidental that i happen to be on the same train as the people i was suppose to meet. Very funny la.. Then they were like trying to direct me to find them but to no avail as there seriously was some problem with my phone, i couldnt hear the other party while they could hear me. Wierd right? Anyway, i somehow got the msg that i was supppose to alight at Raffles City to change train and that was when i got reunited with my friends. Kinda surprised as i was expecting more people to turn up but only saw Zi Hui, Corrine, JingYi and Bernard. Ya.. Went to breeks to eat. They ate the main course while i stuffed myself with this brownie and ice-cream. It was pretty nice la. After that we shopped around. It was kinda fun la. Jingyi left half way through to go for her chalet and we carried on walking around. Went to the golf section and then to the toys department where me and Bernard started playing X-Box!! The graphics were better then i expected. I think the game we were playing was Tomb Raider or something la. Had so much difficulties controlling that character and was told off by this brat! Sorry if you were to read this dude! Cause i dont give a damn! =) Man.. He had this HUGE attitude problem man.. At that point of time, i really wanted to punch him in the face but then i thought, it would reflect badly on me. So i decided to let him go. Then came the embarrassing part. There was this toy grand piano. And i started playing it. Never did i knew that i actually drew a crowd, according to my friends that is. Hahaha.. So funny.. Then we left.

Bernard had to leave for work already and the rest of us continued walking around. Went to Heeren, then back to Taka as corrine had to meet her auntie for dinner or something. Asked her to stay longer and she didnt want cause she didnt wanna go home alone. Haiz.. Gals.. Lol.. Then it was down to me and Zi Hui left. We decided to have dinner out. Went shopping abit more, then walked towards Wisma, then to Wheelock to see if i could get a new handphone cover. To my horror, i found out that it costs $50 to get my current front cover replaced! Oh man.. Then both of us were thinking of ways to file a complain as to how to get them to change my phone. Wanted to call PeiLi but we thought it wouldnt be very nice cause, *smiles*. Ya. And then ZiHui and i ate at Sakae Sushi. That dinner was so funny la.. We talked about so many things, from school to being each other's God sibling? HAhaHa! Wellm the final verdict is that, I'm her "Gan Kor Kor" (Chinese for God OLDER brother) and she is the "Gan Mei Mei". Had this debate over who should be the older one. Lol.. After that we paid and left the place. Yup. There was yet another squabble about some money issue and then we headed down to Borders to look at books.

So funny la.. Went there and look see look see. Then proceeded to the Addidas shop at pacific plaza? (sorry, cant remember the name exactly). Cause she needed to spend on something.. Wierd right? Haha.. Ya.. But didnt see anyhting she liked and then it was off to Orchard MRT station. Lol. Time to go home! At was about 9 plus already. We bid farewell to each other and it was off to home. Called to chat with my boss a.k.a. simin along the way home and she was nice enough to talk to me throughout my entire journey home. Reached home and my sister showed me her clarinet!! Lol.. It was a relative new and expensive one. My sister is holding on to it! Lol.. After that i watched CSI, it was so cool yet intense la. Thought that Nick was going to die or something. Lol,.. Random. Then tried to figure out the MOE thingy with Joce but then gave up half way and then decided to blog. Well, seems like today's entry is relatively long. Tomorrow still have trail at esplanade, meeting Kim at 7 at Commonwealth. Ya. Heading to bed now. Yup. Goodnighty people! Long day.. Phew!

ciA* was here (: .. quickly thank me for posting this entry for u !!

I'm back!

2006-08-26T01:29:00.000+08:00

Hello people, I apologise for not being able to blog for such a long time. You know, some things are just more important than others. Been studying and stuff.. Well, i'm back, and i feels great to be back. My exams are finally over. Now the anxious part is to wait for my results. I have no idea how i'll fair this time round. I seriously have no idea.. It's like in the middle of the night now and i am blogging.. I suppose you must be thinking i'm nuts cosidering the fact that i have a long day in church tmr. Well, if you dont think that i am nuts then.. Something must be wrong with you. Cause i'm a good boy and good boys do not stay up late. Then again.. I am contradicting myself.. I have been sleeping pretty late for the past few nights. Kinda surprised at how i am able to stay awake and still be able to take the exam.

My holidays are finally here. Well, it just hasnt sink in that i am on holiday now. Dont ask me.. i have no idea why.. Maybe that's cuz i havent actually gone out yet? You know.. To do stupid stuff.. I just finished writing a letter to my boss. Very primative right? Ya, i know.. Who in the world writes letters nowadays? And instead of typing it out, i actually hand wrote it. Anyway, It was kinda fun la. Havent written a letter since.. sec 4?? Ya.. =)

It's kinda late already.. I better catch up on some beauty sleep. Havent had one in ages. So then. Take care all you people out there! I really look forward to the week ahead.. So many things installed! Shopping!! I so wanna buy so many things man. I sound kinda gay.. But ya, i do wanna buy quite a few things. Well then, i'll leave it for next time. Till then..

Chill Out!

Footprints..

2006-07-09T23:10:00.000+08:00

One night a man had a dream. He dreamt that he was walking along the beach with the LORD. Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene, he noticed two steps of footprints in the sand; one belonging to him and the other to the LORD. When the last scene of his life flashed before him, he looked back at the footprints in the sand. He noticed that many times along the path of his life there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times in his life.

This really bothered him and he questioned the LORD about it. "LORD you said that once I decided to follow you you'd walk with me all the way. But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life, there was only one set of footprints. I don't understand why when I needed you most you would leave me."

The LORD replied, " My precious, precious child. I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you."

-anonymous-

Ask yourself, how well do you know the LORD? Every Sunday going to church doesn't make you noe the LORD better.. If you love him, you know him.

Spirit Touch your Church

2006-06-18T23:44:00.000+08:00

I am sick and tired of having to worry about everything! I've got my own life to live! Everything around me is dying. And then you ask me if i'm doing anything to help rectify and salvage whatever freaking problem! The answer is that i have and i am still trying my utmost to do something about this ~~DAMN~~ thing! But I am only ONE person! I can't move a mountain as much as i would like to! Now tell me, what in the world am i suppose to do? As much as i would like to see a spiritual revival, it's not possible! Everything is status quo. Maybe there is, but it's not as significant as we would like it to be! This thing is affecting everyone! Everyone is down, everyone is tired, everyone is drained right to the core! Some even at the lowest point of their life now. I don't want to see those whom i care for disappear, walk out one by one, fade away, whatever. I am as drained as anyone is! Please, someone tell me how long is this thing going to last? I'm tired... Very tired in fact... Tried sharing, but nothing is happening. Do you see it as a whole? It's not just us, youth, but sadly, the church as well. You tell me how? How? HOW? HOW? Even as i am typing right now, i doubt this streams of tears can help do anything, or wash away any sorrows. I suppose this is a time where we have to really stick together as a body of Christ and do something, support each other, not tear each other down. It seems that the devil has caused many of us to stumble already or has gotten the better of some of us. But let us not give up hope, brothers and sisters, for this battle is not over yet. Many of us are forgetting the Almighty One up there who is in control of everything. Where is our faith? And are we placing our faith where we should? For "faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see" -Hebrews 11:1 Please walk with me, through this trial. Let us do something together for the sake of our church and most importantly, for God.

2006-06-15T21:41:00.000+08:00

I dreamt of a wonderful place
where golden light touches my face
Springs of warm water flows
And scales of fishes glows
Rainbow above me
Colors too wondrous to see
Gentle fronds tickle
Toes feel the water trickle
A place where we curl up on sand
As we hold each other’s hands

But departure draws nigh
As the sea withdraws its tide
I have sorrow to hide
Without you by my side
Where skies darken
The sea burns
Trees weep for roots taken
My heart churns
That your departure nears
Leaves me Only, in my lonely tears

Yet I could see
The stars burning bright
reassuring me that we will be in each other's sight
And that my gut feeling is right
Yes, we will meet alright

-anonymous

Snores.. Boring..

2006-06-14T21:45:00.000+08:00

Many things happened lately. Some of which were pleasant, but mostly things I wished didn't happen. The holidays are finally here. Yes, I’m finally blogging again. Sorry ya. The past week was just plain studying. Studied in church to prevent myself from slacking around at home. Ya. Had to see BJ practically everyday. Well then, loads of things are troubling me but I don't wish to type them down cuz it wouldn't help much. For those of you who know what happened, I hope we will pray along side each other. Ya..

Just came back from piano lesson not too long ago. Today had 2 hours to make-up for the sat I was having my papers. My piano teacher is really ZAI man.. I'm really impressed by her piano skills and everything. She is really really good. The way her fingers run. My gawsh.. Jaw really can drop one lor. She told me about her family background and I felt really inferior lor. Her elder sister is a Head Professor in Oxford University, wrote quite a number of books, her name is Shirley Chew. Her elder brother is an ambassador for Singapore in the states or something. She herself is an accomplished pianist, she quite a lot of certificates. Her younger brother just graduated from NTU with masters in something lah.. Asked her about perfect pitch and stuff. Finally got the answer from someone wise. *Hey mikh! Perfect pitch can't be trained! It's inborn!* Asked her if it can be trained, she told me it's not possible. The only way is to remember a particular key. But then again, it is not accurate. She said there are pros and cons to having a perfect pitch. Well, something like, people with perfect pitch get really agitated with out of tune notes. A piece that's been played before has to be in the key he/she played before or it'll affect the pitch thingy. She played through my Beethoven song and was pleasantly surprised with her ability to memorize the entire piece and still play the entire piece as though it's a grade 1 piece. Shocking.

Man. I can't help but talk about Singapore Idol because it really sucks. I don't blame the contestants for singing horribly but the judges. The reason why the outcome is so horrible is because the feedback given by the judges aren't constructive at all! For heavens' sake! Talk about their voices! Close your bloody eyes and listen to their voice with your ears! Don’t look at their dress sense! Hello! This is a SINGING COMPETITION if you are still left somewhere in project runway land! I think I can be a better judge then you. Or for a matter of fact, I think my piano teacher can be better then you. You are trying to groom an idol out of this. At the rate you're going. You're more likely to groom an idiot out! Thus far, the only person I think is good enough to be an idol is Jonathan Leong. The others.. Cannot make it.. They can't even sing a song in tune! The moment they start singing, the TV. just seems to find a way to switch itself off. Like how cool is that right?? K. Enough. Don't wanna continue already. All I can say is, for the next round of Singapore Idol, PEOPLE WHO CAN SING, PLEASE, FOR GOODNESS SAKE, JOIN THE DARN COMPETITION! Well then, that's all for one day. Take care!

2006-05-21T22:42:00.000+08:00

Hello people. sorry i haven't been blogging for a reaaaalllly long time. Pardon me lah. Loads of things happened and ya.. Don't wanna leave you hanging anymore.. So here i am blogging! Better type down everything before i forget what i wanna say. Well.. To start things off. I joined track officially. =)*round of applause* along with my classmate edmund and now jocelyn, her friend and yien also thinkin of joining. Wow.. Amazing right? All of because i joined track. *smiles* okok..

Well.. Eh.. I finally got to spend time with my gang today! I'm so happy! Though at times i feel kinda stupid.. You know.. The CANNOT make it kind of jokes that i make. Ya. We caught the 2.30pm Da Vinci Code show. I can't help but say that i'm actually quite surprised at how Dan Brown is able to piece everything together to form this great lie/deception and still make it sound chao convincing! My only fear is that people who are weak in their faith will be swayed by the lies. You know.. This show really clouds your mind and really makes you think twice as to whether the things are fact or plain fiction. But seriously, everything was rubbish lah. But i dun think i can say it for non-christians cuz, they made it sound very real. What the heck.. DAN BROWN! You'll pay for causing people to backslide and for makin non-christians.. erm.. detest christianity even more? Man.. God will really punish you. Then again. You're sued already aight? Haha..

And ya.. Choir recording this coming Thurs. Bet it's gonna be super fun! I really missed the good times we had when the 7 of us joined the choir together. I doubt we'll ever join as that 7 again. I mean.. I understand that you guys have got other commitments. Well.. This year's musicale, the Clown, there are these 4 villians called E, V, I and L. Together they form the E.V.I.L. team lah.. Then if mikh and BJ could join this year, we, Jordan Mikh, BJ and i, could've taken on that role. Sad eh? But what's done is done. And i dun regret joining. =)

I think i'll just end off for now. Tired already. I promise i'll blog more often aight peeps? See ya'll around!

DISORGANIZED... LANCE!?

2006-05-10T22:01:00.000+08:00

Guess what people? For the FIRST time in my entire poly life, i got SCOLDED by a teacher! She practically SCREAMED at me! I have never been YELLED at before and this is the first time. She, of all teachers, set the record! Like how amazing is that? I have never been so insulted in my life before. Come to think of it, i've never even been SCREAMED at in secondary school! Cummon people. Make a clever guess on what in the world she SCOLDED me for? First one to get it right gets a punch in the face. Any takers??

Ok. Shall not keep you in suspense. She SCOLDED me for not allocating questions to the different groups in my class! Who would have thought of that!? Ain't she just totally brilliant? It was the first tutorial of the week and THE FREAKIN' GROUPS WEREN'T EVEN FORMED YET! How in the world am i suppose to allocate the questions. Ok then.. You might think.. Why is Lance stupid enough to not group them himself. The FREAKIN' REPLY you're gonna get from me is that IF i were to do that, THE ENTIRE CLASS WOULD SCREAM AT ME INSTEAD! So.. tight position huh? What to do.. Then again, like what my class said after tutorial, she didn't even tell me to get the groups sorted out and questions allocated the week before. So tell me.. Am i suppose to read her FREAKIN' MIND? I AM SO NOT TELEPATHIC YOU KNOW!? Oh wells. What's done is done.

My friends were saying, "why didn't you answer her back and told her she didn't specify anything the week before?" And i was like. Why bother? It'll only create more hostility. And she PUNISHED me by asking me to write out the longest A/R ledger. Isn't it just so sweet of her? So can might as well make it to my "condemn list of people". I wouldn't have reacted this way if you told me off cuz of a more SERIOUS issue. So the next time round, please scold me for a better reason eh? Cause you totally ruined my reputation with such a lousy one. Haha.. To summarise everything, she scolded me for being disorganised. Who would have thought of that. DISORGANIZED... LANCE!? What the hell.

Anyways, edmund and i called up the person-in-charge o track and got the details of it and stuff. Yup. Mon, Wed and Fri. 5pm to 7.15pm. Yup. Training starts next Mon. I have a feeling i might just die.

Choir Prac.. Help!?

2006-05-04T23:21:00.000+08:00

Hey people.. Sorry i haven't been blogging for quite some time. But alas.. I'm here again. Loads of things happened but i'll just zoom in on what happened today. Today was an incredibly long day for me. I'm super shacked and i really neeeeeeed to recharge my batteries or i'll go to school looking like a zombie tomorrow. Suppose to start at 11 but then i had to meet my Events Management group mates to plan for the upcoming event. Ok.. I'll officially announce the event we're organising here. It's cosplay. Some of you will be.. err.. while others will be like.. Woohoo! But whatever it is. Ya.. We're targeting a min. of say.. 30 to 40 people? Ya.. It's open to everyone. Not only Ngee Ann students aight? So if you wanna come. Please drop me a message ya? I'll keep you guys informed. Obviously the more the merrier la.. Cuz we do need to have a definite number of people who'll be turnin up then we can submit our proposal. So you'll really do me a HUGE favour if you come. *gleaming smile*

Ok.. And so the day dragged on till about 4 and then i had to meet my group again for project. Crazy right? After that i headed down to church. Ate dinner ALONE.. *"Lonely.. I'm Mr. Lonely.. I have no.."* Anyways.. After that i stoned and tried readin my lecture notes and stuff till choir started. But obviously to no avail la. Nothing went in. Super tired already by then.. Went in and was told by uncle Biao that i will be taking the tenors for practise from today onwards. Well.. I was really hesistant la.. Kinda like "Tui San Tui Si" if you get what i mean.. Then i told to myself. It's only like 5 tenors right? So it wasn't that bad.. Ok.. Or so i think that is. And here comes the freakin irritatin bit. No offense to you IF you do happen to read this blog for whatever reason though i doubt you will. There's this Indian guy (Not that i'm racist)is a tenor.. He just.. DOESN'T BLEND IN AT ALL! He goes out of tune and he still sings it really REALLY LOUDLY! It sort of like.. confuses the rest of the tenors, to the extent where uncle Biao came up to me personally to tell.. I'll this for later..

Anyway, while leadin the tenors.. I did voice it out to him in a very nice way to adapt with the rest and not try to try lead the tenors with your.. wierd tone? Not sure if he got the meanin behind it. Anyways.. He is very domineering and super straight forward. He argues with me and tries to prove his point and then i'll try to prove mine and then i'll still win cuz it's written in black and white. And then he'll start apologising.. He tries to overpower me. Ok.. Fine.. So i'm pretty new to leadin a group and stuff.. But.. I'm JUST DOING MY JOB! Hello?? I may be alot younger then you.. But.. Won't you just stop it for the sake of the rest? The rest just sat there and stared at him. I could feel that the rest were feeling the same way as me. Trust me. And ya, I know that you may have practised at home or may have some musical background. But.. You really need to give the rest a chance. They haven't learnt it yet! Don't move on ahead of the others! So he was yoddling on and on and on.. And the rest just.. Couldn't find their way. And even when i stopped playing the piano.. He CONTINUED! I mean.. Seriously.. I really wanna tell you but i don't know how to phrase it in a nice way. And i can only pray that you'll realise that being in a choir is about working together as a group and not an individual. You may have memorised and know the notes well. But.. It's about blendin in and helping each other out. You just stop as and when you like and then come in as LOUD as you can and it just ruins the entire song! I can't even get my pitch right when i sit beside you. And it's just so difficult!

After the entire choir practise, uncle Biao came up to me and told me that one member in my group was off pitch. Towards the flat/sharp whatever.. and i immediately pointed out who it was and uncle Biao also acknowledged. I mean.. CAN'T YOU HEAR YOURSELF? If it were me. I'd me too embarrassed to sing the rest of the song and i'll try coming in SOFTLY! But you don't do it that way. We don't need a LEAD TENOR you know? You sound like a spoilt trombone who can't control your tone and volume. And yet he still yacks on. I'm terribly sorry i couldn't deliver my job as a tenor leader or whatever you call it. I just.. Couldn't do it. The only reason why they split the tenors and the bass was cuz they wanted sectionals to be more efficient and effective. Obviously it didn't work out. The bass improved alot! And the tenors were still.. there.. I seriously dunno how to tell you this. Yien told me that direct people tend to accept direct comments since they are of that category. But i'm afraid it might hurt him.. I'm sorry.. Sorry if i caused anyone to be hostile toward me after readin this entry..

2006-04-26T21:37:00.000+08:00

Today is the 3rd day of school but i have no lectures today so.. i don't suppose you can consider this day the 3rd day of school. Well.. All i can say now is that the topics are definitely much tougher. This semester focuses more on theory i suppose. Audit, Financial Management, Cost Accountin.. etc. Come to think of it.. Everything in this sem is related to accounts, unlike last sem where we did some business management shit.. Lolx.. Well then.. Thus far, my Tues and Fris are the longest days. Stretches from 9, all the way till 4. With only an hour's break. Yup. Did some reading for tomorrow's lecture and oh man.. The entire thing was just words after words.. But it was interesting to know the different different aspects of audit. Hey and the definition of auditing is SO cool. I even memorised it. Here goes.. "Auditing is the process by which a competent and independent person accumulates and evaluates evidence about quantifiable information related to a specific economic entity for the purpose of determining and reporting on the degree of correspondence between the quantifiable information and established criteria" Like how cool is that?? Ok.. Enough crapping for the day. Well then. Goodnight!

2006-04-23T20:33:00.000+08:00

Today was our 125th Presbyterian Anniversary, so service was held at the indoor stadium. Cause i was involved in the U12 team, me and my sis, along with the rest of the team, had to be at the indoor stadium by 9. Was kinda surprised that everyone was there when we reached. Lolx.. Everything's suppose to start at 10am. After worship, which was the first segment, we were given a 30 to 45 mins break? Ya. There was this magic show and screening of a movie for the children and auntie corinne told us to go take a break.

We headed over to 7-eleven. Cause we weren't very familiar with the place, we went one whole big round. So farnie.. Then we walked pass the kallang river and passed by dragonboaters.. Finally reached our destination thanks to me. =) We embraced ourselves cause we sort of figured that the price of the food and drinks would be jaw dropping. And true enough, one hotdog bun cost $4!! And a miserable cup of drink cost $2.50.. Then pearlyn and I were talkin about where we could get it the cheapest and stuff. So dumb. Talkin to her abit the no link. Just like what my gang say about me too. I think that's why we can crap so much. Lolx.. Thanks Pearlyn! Anyways, we sat outside the North entrance and started talkin. Man oh man. Then we head the Orchestra and the choir!! They were good! Then me and BJ decided to go take a look. Haha.. Stood there to listen.. Man.. Heard the oboe and horn. *heart melts* So nice.. Lol. Then Joseph and 2 Issacs ran toward us. So farnie..

After stoning for a good long time, we decided to head back. Sat behind the door the kids were in and then out of no where, we started singing last year's musicale songs. Ya.. The good old days.. =) We had fun singing i suppose. After that we went back to lead the kids in a time of worship again and that was all for the day. Everything ended at about 12.30 or so.

Dad brought us to eat Cha Kuay Tiao nearby and thereafter, went to look at cars. My dad's eyeing this Nissan car called "Selphy" or something. Yup. The exterior is ok. But as for the interior.. Err.. It's.. Not as nice as the outside la. Went home after that. Lazed around a bit and then i went to sleep. Now i'm at my gramp's house. Blogging and chatting. Yup. That's it for today!

2006-04-22T00:13:00.000+08:00

Haha.. Went out with my godfather today. Haven't really spent time with him lately, so today was like a "catch up on each other's life" day. He came to pick me up at 12.15 and we headed down to Holland V to eat. Ate at Thai Express.. He ordered pineapple rice and i ate this really spicy noodles.. Very very nice, though half the time i was cleaning the sweat off my forehead.. Lolx.. We talked about stuff over lunch and practically lazed there. After that we went to this pet shop just round the corner to look at the dogs. The dogs were so beautiful man.. Saw the Siberian Husky and the Golden Retriever. Wanna touch also can't cuz there was that glass panel.. Darn.. Lolx.. Anyways.. Just so that people know. My godpa is a dog lover but his wife isn't. So he can't keep one.. Kinda sad eh? Well.. My whole family loves dogs too but we know that we don't have the time to look after it. It's high maintenance to keep a dog. So we decided not to get one. If not the dog would have to suffer at our expense.. Well then.. After that, we went to Mac to eat. The one near Queenstown?? More like inbetween Commonwealth and Queenstown. The one with the pretty big pond. Yup.. And guess what? I saw Cheryl there. So farnie.. After eating, we went to this floral shop just beside Mac. My godpa needed to get something from there and after grabbing his stuff, he sent me home. Lazed around and went to gramp's house to eat dinner. =)The Tom Yam soup my grandma cooks is chao delicious. Thank you! Now i'm back home blogging just before i turn in. Tomorrow is going to be a long day. See ya peeps!

2006-04-20T22:16:00.000+08:00

Oh gosh.. Woke up at 5.30 today.. Work, work, work.. But thank goodness today is the last day i'll be working. School starting next week. For today's trail, we went to botanic garden. And this is the worst trail i've ever done. For those of you who did the trail with me today. You guys should know how i feel. I shall not go through the details cuz i don't want to put you through the pain. All i can say is that they are horrid little.. things! ACS primary.. I officially pronounce them.. hopeless.. Ok.. Enough about them.

Anyways.. Everything ended at about 11 plus and i headed home. Just in time to catch my breath and then pick my sis from school at 1pm. Thereafter, i bought her food, did the household chores and then headed out to meet my "boss" a.k.a simin. We went down to town to go look at the crumpler to see if it suits her and stuff. And after much persuasion, she finally decided to get it. [sorry gal for not waitin for you to get the crumpler together!] Lolx.. She bought the red one. Mine was the green one.. So farnie.. I can just imagine what people will think if i walked down Orchard Road next to her when we carry our crumplers.. "Christmas Tree".. Ate Tori-Q and stoned for quite a while in town before we decided to head home. Well.. Home for her that is, and church for me. Had choir practise for the clown musical organised but both Katong Pres and Trueway Pres while will be held at VCH at the end of this year. During the Christmas Period that is. =) I think i mentioned to a few of you people before.I do hope that you guys can make it ya?

Well.. So now here i am blogging just before i turn in for the day. Very very tired. Tomorrow i'll be going out with my godfather but he hasn't replied me. Don't even know where in the world are we going. He asked me to wear shorts, t-shirt and sports shoes.. Maybe go running.. Lolx.. Tennis? Don't know lah.. Anyways.. I'm signing off. Take care people!

I'll be ME

2006-04-10T21:47:00.000+08:00

Went running today after sending my sister to school. After that, came back, took a bath and slept for a while and then did the household chores. Sian.. Later part of the day i had to go down for a briefing for Wed's Airport trail. There was another briefing at 6 supposedly, for Botanics, but then they cut me off.. Not just me, but En and Joce too.. All thanks to Lena for her persistent ranting on how near Sungei Buloh is from Botanics.. Gave us the hope that we'll be working to earn extra bucks.. But what the hell. I don't wanna bitch about it anymore. It'll only occupy space in my brain. I suppose in life, you seriously need to let go of a lot of things. Things that are not worth worrying for.. The whole of last week, things didn't really turn out the way it's suppose to be. I don't wanna care anymore.. Well.. As of today. Everything will be contained within me. Will not pour out my feelings to anyone, other then God.. He's the only person thus far, who REALLY understands me. I'll be ME.

Does it have to be this way?

2006-03-31T23:27:00.000+08:00

Never really been shot at twice in a row, coming from a person whom i confide in in times of need. It would have soften the blow if you came up to me personally to tell me, then to slap it in my face in front of everyone. What's done is done. There's nothing anyone can do to turn back time. Kinda stinks when you have friends you can't even relate to.. We can't even end a conversation with a smile on our face. Maybe it's cause i didn't phrase what i intended to say the way it's suppose to be. But to me, every sentence you make seem to be a personal attack.. Why? Maybe it's just me.. I'm wierd, i'm the odd one out, I'm just trying too hard to blend in.. It's really hard to tell you. Trust me..

Tired.. Drained.. Need to recharge..

2006-03-30T23:04:00.000+08:00

Ladiladila.. Sorry.. Screw a bit loose. Today went for the trail at MacRitchie. Bunked at En's house last night. Surprising we managed to sleep for more then 3 hours. Could have slept more if it weren't for Jason. But it's ok la.. Considering.. Heiheihei.. *grins* You should know what i mean. Haha.. Okok.. Enough crap. Waited for this bro of ours to come to En's house before we could finally sleep la.. So i was like channel surfing the entire night until he arrived at like erm.. 1 plus? Anyways.. The main thing is that we managed to catch some sleep. Woke up at like 5.30 by this wierd alarm tone from Jason's phone. Totaly startled me lah.. Washed up and stuff and went to eat breakfast. After that we took a bus down to our destination.

The ride there was crap lah.. So many people. Then this guy kpet on resting his entire body weight on me. Aiya.. He was pretty heavy. But considering the fact that the bus was kinda pack. I just closed both eyes. Reached there and started the trail and stuff. It was White Sands Pri. The kids were pretty ok, though they weren't very enthu at the beginning. They managed to be more open after that. Haha.. They even bought me a drink after the entire trail to thank me. So nice of them right?? Wahaha.. En and Jason must be chao jealous. But they had really tough kids. So.. It really depends on the class and stuff. I am blessed to have such a nice class.

After the entire trail, we headed to West Mall. Kinda dumb cause we reached there then left shortly.. Reason being we had nothing to do there. Wanted to chill there or something initially? But decided to head over to En's house for lunch instead. Auntie Grace's "Shui Jiao Mian" is the nicest man! LOVE IT!! Plus the chilli from HongKong i suppose. Woah! Haha.. Thanks auntie Grace!! She is a really good cook. Haha.. After eating, Jingjing woke up and i played the piano with her for a bit before i headed home. Jingjing is down with a fever. So do pray for her ya people? Thanks. Headed home, vacuumed the floor, took a bath, ate Mac which my dad bought and slept till 6.15..

Had adult service band prac at 8pm. Reached church at 7 plus and sat through Charles' YZ anniversary's band prac until it was time for me and en to go for band prac. Everything went smoothly and we ended pretty early.. After that i headed home.. Chao tired. So here i am blogging just before i turn in for the night. Might be running tomorrow morning. See how lah.. Anyways. That's about it for today. Till next time guys!

2006-03-28T19:21:00.000+08:00

Woke up at 6am today to send my sister to school at 6.30 and decided to go for a run. Ran from my house to Buona Vista MRT station and headed toward Ghim Moh that direction and then home. Some of you guys must be thinking.. "Lance can't be blogging now.." Ya ya.. It is me. =) Pretty proud of myself too.. Reached home, took a bath, rest for a bit and it was time to head down to church for Puppet Practise. Yup.. Met Yi En and Jing jing on the train. You guys should have looked at the faces Jing Jing was making lah.. So cute and funny. So wanna pinch her cheeks. Anyways, this Sat is YZ's Anniversary! Just received a message from Wuch saying that my DG is suppose to prepare $25 worth of BeeHoon.. Oh.. And the worship leader for this Sunday is Ming. Jia You gal! I'm sure you'll deliver a great worship. =) Okok.. Nothing much happened today. Came home, did some household chores, took a nap and here i am blogging. Yup. Take care guys.

Life is full of "Should I"s and "Shouldn't I"s

2006-03-27T16:54:00.000+08:00

Hey.. Here i am blogging once more just before i head out to meet En and Jason for the facilitator job thingy. So farnie.. Last min cancel our original trail and then asked if we could go down today for the MacRitchie briefing at 6pm. Anyways.. I'll be heading down in a while.. Man.. Oh ya.. Dora.. You didn't miss out much lah.. Joce was just being herself if you know what i mean. She'll only drool at the sight of cute guys lah.. She was super upset that you could see those cute ang mohs over at Perth everyday when all she could see is.. nothing? Dunno lah.. So you better bring her back some.. Or she might just die.. Haiya..

Life is full of "should i"s and "shouldn't i"s.. First was the crumpler thingy.. Still haven't really decided whether i should get one or not.. Now it's the musical thingy. I did pray about it before and i thought the answer was NO but then auntie Marilyn and uncle Biao came up to Jason, Jordan and me last Sunday to ask if we wanted to join the musical.. I mean.. I thought i went through this already? Then i was thinking to myself.. God wouldn't have gotten someone to ask me if He's plan wasn't for me to join the musical right? So now that He opened that opportunity again.. Should i take it up? Jason and Jordan were ok with it other then me.. Guess i need to pray some more then.. Well.. There is this one other stuff which I think i'd rather keep to myself for the mean time..

Well then.. I'm finally at the book of Numbers.. At least i've got something to be happy about.. Then again.. I've still got quite a number of books to go.. I'm suppose to be at Judges now.. Anyways.. I've gotta go already..

Youth Sunday!!

2006-03-27T00:34:00.000+08:00

Sunday.. Here i am blogging just before i turn in for the day. See that some peeps have been reading my blog. Lolx.. Jocelyn! If you're reading this, you should know what i mean lah.. No need to explain further one. Heiheihei.. You were drooling lor.. Come on.. Don't you dare deny.. The area around you all wet wet one lor.. Covered with your saliva.. Haiya.. Don't blame you. Well then.. Let's not talk about that here.. Today was Youth Sunday and the youths led the congregation in a time of worship. (i mean like duh..) BJ was the worship leader and he did a really great job. Many adults were impressed and commented that he was young yet so matured and stuff.. The funny part was when they said that he looked like an uncle up there. Oh man.. BJ old already.. My heart bleeds for you. Anyways.. I can't help but say that uncle Say Tiong mentioned that he liked how the band played and stuff.. He came up to me and said he likes how we always play in time. Heard that band? YOU GUYS DID A GREAT JOB! But remember guys, all glory still goes to God. So do not be complacent and stuff. We did encounter SOME problems during band prac but thank God that everything is settled. Was kinda afraid that you guys would take it negatively but everything turned out fine. God is really wonderful. After service and stuff, wanted to go play DOTA with the rest of the gang lah.. But my parents wanted me to have lunch with them cuz they haven't eaten with me for the past 2 days. Well then.. So we went to eat as a family and then we headed home.. I stoned around for a bit and then i slept all the way till 7pm. Very the shiok.. After that, we had to go over to my gramp's house for dinner. That's about it.. Till next time then. =)

Grade 8 Piano Practical Results!!!!

2006-03-23T21:36:00.000+08:00

Today, it was just staying at home and doing the household chores day. Cleared up some more of my stuff and managed to do the laundry and vacuum the floor and also cook for my sis.. Actually nothing special other then towards the night. I knew my results would be out this week and was waiting eagerly to find out how i did.. Then my piano teacher entered my house with the "you didn't make it" face and told me she received my results already. At that point of time i was like.. Oh shit.. Confirm die already.. Then we went to my room, cuz that was where the piano was, and she told me that i did pretty well. I was like super relieved lah. Happy and stuff.. Really.. I really thanked God. He really pulled me through and not to forget all those people who have been constantly encouraging me and stuff. THANK YOU EVERYBODY! PRAISE THE LORD! AMEN!! I was pretty high. It wasn't as good as my grade 7 results in which i got a merit but i'm happy enough with a pass. =) The next step is to go for my diploma. Chatted with my teacher a while and got to know more about the life after grade 8 and stuff. She'll be recommending me to her ex-teacher, Jennifer Chew, who is pretty known in Singapore. I was really thrilled lah.. And I'll be taking my theory with this other pretty known lady called Josephine Koh. She's known for good theory books and stuff. Oh man.. Just talking about all these just makes me excited man. But hey man.. Thanks once again! Love you peeps out there!!

SENTOSA!! WooHoo!!

2006-03-22T23:37:00.000+08:00

En, Joce, Jason and I went to Sentosa.. Considering the fact that i'm not a beach bum, going to Sentosa to chill must be a jaw-dropping thingy to most of you.. Anyways.. We had fun there i suppose. The initial stage of if was kinda sian until this group of peeps came up to us and asked if we wanted to have a game of ulitmate frisby and touch rugby.. Well.. We used the volleyball in place of the rugby that is.. They also asked these 2 ang mohs to play with us and they were pretty good looking with the abs and stuff.. So i suppose you know what Jocelyn's reaction was.. Anyways.. We left the place at around 5 plus i suppose, after everyone bathed and stuff that is. Then something happened to my phone.. It went crazy.. Can't seem to function properly.. I suppose it's cause i accidentally wet my phone? Dunno lah.. Crap..

Then i asked them to bring my phone to Nokia care to service it? But it was closed already.. Well.. Thanks for bringing it down for me even though it was closed.. I'm sorry you guys had to make a trip down. The reason why i didn't go with them was cuz i had to play for prayer service. The worship leader was uncle Kien Seng. And i was his only musician. Well, it was pretty good actually! It was the very first time i attended a Prayer Service. At the end of it all, people came up to me to thank me for playing. It was nice. Well.. I was quite surprised that some peeps dodn't know i knew how to play the piano. But anyways.. It doesn't really matter. It lasted for an hour and then I waited for Joce, En and Jason in church cuz we were suppose to down to Joce's house to eat supper. The food was nice.. Really.. So.. "Thanks auntie Lily for the food!" =) I left the place earlier then them cuz it was running a litlle late. Reached home and shared everything with my mum and i'll be heading to bed soon.. *Hope Jason reads this and sends me the photos soon. Lolx*

2006-03-21T14:19:00.000+08:00

Here i am stoning in front of the com again and i decided to update this blog. A little while more and i'll be heading down town to meet Joce and En for a "no spending, just talking" session. Sounds ok ba.. And guess wat? I'm the band IC for Youth Sunday! Kyna is still the overall in-charge and the band conprises of Mikh, Rachel, Jason, Ming, me and of course our Worship Leader himself, BJ. Well.. Pray that everything will run smoothly this coming Sun. Oh ya.. I was thinking of getting myself a crumpler.. Been asking around and most said go ahead lor.. Still in dilemma.. Cuz i need a sling bag.. Besides.. It's more convenient too.. Especially since i'm my job requires walking around..

My results will be out soon! By the end of tis friday that is.. Not sure how i'm gonna fare but i'm pretty sure i'll do better then my piano exam.. Think i'm gonna be so dead.. Well.. And piano results will be out this week too i suppose.. Okok.. I think that's it for the moment. I've gotta go already guys. See ya!

2006-03-20T22:54:00.000+08:00

Hello.. Today is the first day of my facil job.. Me, Yien and KaiQing went for the thingy today in which we had to be in St. Hildas Primary by 7.30AM.. Crap right? But thanks to brilliant old me, we decided to bunk at Jason's house the night before.. *applause* Me and En met at Clementi at 7 plus and headed down to Tampines.. Reached there already then decided to eat at one of the outlets at Tampines mall. Then we hanged around there till the arrival of Jason.. Went to Pasah Malam (Is that how you spell it?) En saw lingerie and wanted to buy them but decided not to.. Ok.. That part was crap.. Then went to the arcade to chill.. It's been ages since i ast step foot in that place lah.. played the driving game and i obviously emerged last out of the 3 of us. Then we headed to Jason's place. Used his com a bit and then went to the living room to watch movies. That marked the start of the never-ending movie marithon.. And i really mean never ending cause we never really did finish watching a movie.. All half way only.. Anyways.. We watched throughout the night until bout 4 and chatted for quite a while and then went to bed only at what.. 5AM/5.30AM?? But the chatting session was really great i suppose. Ya.. Did share some stuff.. And thanks guys for hearing me out. =)Only had an hour of sleep and then we had to get ready already.. So we went to school looking like zombies lor.. Good old bro brought us to that place and left us there while he attended some meeting.. The kids were pretty much ok.. Not really notorious, they were just being kids i suppose.. They were pretty hard to control at times.. But what really made our day was when they all thanked us and told us "Thank you Jie Jie Yi En and Kor Kor Lance. And may God bless you!" After hearing those words.. I was like.. It was all worth it man.. Though it was pretty agonizing at times.. Everything ended by 12.30PM and we all headed back. Met Jason again and we headed our different ways le.. Well.. All i can say is that it was really hard handling those kids but it did bring much joy to see those happy faces at the end of it.. Yup..

2006-03-16T02:11:00.000+08:00

Dear diary.. (Sounds stupid though)Today i went down for the briefing regarding the facilitator job i signed up. Started at 7 and i met my church friend Yi En at BK for dinner. BJ was there too.. Then we headed to that place for the briefing. Surprised to see Kim there too.. I mean.. Kim? She signing up for the MacRitchie Trail?? Totally not her.. She can't handle the heat! And with those kids.. I bet i will hear her screaming her lungs out. Then again, it's kinda wierd to think that i'll actually be handling 20 kids single handedly. Man.. I'll most probably end up pulling out all my hair (though i might not have much hair to pull) or might end myself up in jail. Well.. Then again.. It's for the money.. And hey.. I do like children.. I hope? What the hell.. It just feels kinda uncomfortable posting an entry again after the past incident.. I suppose it'll always reside within me that these kinda things do happen? And to whoever did that.. I'm sorry i said those stuff and blew my top at you.. And.. I graciously forgive you?? That's what i'm suppose to do. So.. I'm sorry.. =) Hope my apology is accepted. Yup.. I'll be starting work officially on next monday i think.. The thing about it is that the dates are not fixed.. So you don't really have a fixed pay either.. But look on the bright side! I'm getting paid like 30 to 40 bucks just for a few hours! Ok.. That's all for now guys. Till next time!

2006-03-08T22:31:00.000+08:00

Hey IDIOTIC! F*** off if you're not happy alright? This is my blog! What i wanna type here is totally none of your F***ING business aight!? Whether i update it or not has got no concern of yours. Some dimwit, stupefied, ill-advised, moronic idiot you are.. Go find something better to do rather then poke your filthy nose in MY BLOG! Can't believe someone like you would pose such ill-mannered comments on other people's blog.. So are you freakin overjoyed you called me a F**KER now?? You better watch what you write on people's tag board.. DO YOU GET ME??

2005-12-09T13:03:00.000+08:00

Sian-ed.. If there's such a word. Loads of things happened recently and it isn't the most exciting thing that ever happened. My only prayer is for everything to be the way it was before. All of us laughing and crapping together.. Now i'm stoning infront of the my friend's laptop. So i decided to update my blog since it's been ages since i last did that. Oh man.. Today is a really tiring day lah.. I start school at 9 and end at 7!! Schooling marithon.. Specially went to school early today cuz i left my entire file in school. Thanks to God's grace i was able to find it. Went home yesterday and found out that the entire file was missing.. Imagine the position i was in yesterday. All freaked out and stuff. Ya.. Thanks to Dora who kept on reminding me to pray, i was able to maintain my calm eventually. =) So here i am now.. Waiting for my next tutorial to start and then i'll stone somemore till 5 then i'll attend this extra lecture. Followed by deciding whether i should join my ALW friends who are going for this Gospel Rally or the 7 friends who are going to eat steamboat.. That's it for now i suppose.

Lance Out!

2005-11-02T12:35:00.000+08:00

Time flies.. It's been a while since i last posted an entry.. Sorry peeps.. Well.. Second semester just started.. And it marks the start of my mugging already.. Woah.. Today is the eve of my birthday.. I've been hinting to everyone since God knows when.. I suppose it's the excitement i'm feeling.. You know? The rush of adrenalin thingy? Sorry guys if i irritated you or something.. Like c'mon man.. It's my 17th birthday? Haha.. Can't wait! Few more hours before the clock strikes 12! And feisty old me will bring the house down! Woahoo! Actually i won't.. Come to think of it.. The only thing i can bring down is the photo frames ON the walls.. As for the walls?? Maybe not.. Singapore's foundation is so strong.. I can't even create a hole in the wall, nonetheless take down the entire wall..

Went to parkway parade today... Went shopping with my folks.. My dad wanted to get me a couple of shirts from OP but nothing caught my eye.. And ya.. We didn't get anything.. Then we went to look around and i got this 'Playing the Keyboard in Worship' book from LifeBookshop.. Browse through it a little and found it quite good.. After reading it.. I'll pass it to someone else.. They teach you loads of stuff.. From the basic techniques to improvisation and everything else! It's really good. Yup.. I think i'll end here for now.. Hey.. At least i wrote something.. Okay then..

Lance Out!

2005-06-28T01:05:00.000+08:00

Hi people, yes, i know it's been a long time since i last blogged. But here i am again.. I'm havin BCA tutorial now.. It's some stewpig computing application shit lah. Man.. Really rottin'now.. Total waste of time but i have to be here. Loads of stuff happened lately. I joined the Campus Crusade for Christ in Ngee Ann and well.. Can't really say much about it. Just that at times, i do feel a little out of place. Like a mouse in the city if you know what i mean.. They really focus on evangelism.. And for those of you who know me.. I'm not good at it. It's definitely not my forte.. So i kinda don't fit in? Aniwaes.. I'm gonna give it a few more shots before i lay my final verdict. Hmmm.. I wanna join a sport lah.. Still very indecisive.. Dunno what to join. Badminton? Tennis? Squash? Maybe i should just follow my heart. Think it's kinda pointless gettin' people's opinion. The ultimate decision is me ya? Stupid me.. Should have thought of this rigght from the start. I think i better end here for the time being. Will keep this blog updated frequently. Yup.
Lance signing out!

2005-05-12T11:50:00.000+08:00

Hi again, people of the universe! Okay... My intros are getting lame man! Aniwaes.. I haven't been very free lately.. Got loads of stuff to do. And school's startin' soon.. Like what the hack!? So many things left undone.. Dunno where to start. Just thought i'd just come here and relief STRESS first. Haiya.. Today i went to check my timetable online.. And to my horror, we have to study for like 23hrs a week! I was cheated.. Well... Someone cheated my feelin'. He told me that people from the BA faculty only has to study for 16hrs.. Aiya... Hack lah. At least it's better then studyin in JC. Sorrie peeps out there! *Lance apologises sincerely* I mean ppl who are studyin in JC now.. Really pitiful sia.. start school so early.. End school so late.. Dun even have time for themself.. let alone their school work.. Must complete tutorials and stuff. My heart bleeds for you guys man!
This weekend is goin' to be very pack! Jam pack with action and excitement. (Actually you can ignore the words after pack) cuz it's gonna pack only. Got to prepare for speech for my grauation from this brain boostin' course, book 20+ seats at Seoul Garden, then got church stuff, suppose to be the band & programme IC, also must prepare prayer.. Then Campus Crusade called today 'n' asked if want to go for the chalet thingy which clashes with the BA camp. Stupid BA.. dunno why so many camps.. They think that we very free like that.. The fact is that we're not! Total waste of time. I can do tons of other stuff with this time lah.. Aniwaes, all i know is that this weekend, or should i say from friday night onwards.. I won't even have time for myself.. Dotz.. People, i have but 1 request. Please pray for good organisation of everythin'. Hope i won't screw anything up.. Thanks. Okay. That's it for today. Lance out!

2005-04-19T12:20:00.000+08:00

Hello again, here is Lance typin' another entry. Hmm... Today's the 18th of April. Well, it would've been our 16th month. Haha, it doesn't really matter anymore. Anyways, I dun really have much to type today only that i pray that God would heal my mother's hand. Suppose you would wanna know what happened to her hand ya?
Well... A week ago, she told us that the 4th 'n' 5th finger of her left hand felt numb. Initially we took it pretty lightly until it worsened. From numb to pain. She couldn't sleep for the past few nights cuz of the intense pain she felt in her hand. It was only then when we noticed the seriousness of her situation. We asked her to consult a doctor. In total we consulted 2 doctors. The 1st doctor just prescribed her a medicine to ease the pain but to no avail. Then she went on to see another doctor cuz the 1st was obviously hopeless. It did soothe the pain but not completely. On Sunday, my parents met up with this qualified doctor, Dr. Chan Kin Meng, from our church 'n' he told my mum then it could be the cause of something pressin onto the nerves on her left arm, 'n' advised her to go for an MRI Scan.
Tomorrow, she will be goin' for the scan 'n' i hope that everythin goes well. If the nerves seem to be blocked but something, an operation has to be conducted to remove whateva's blockin it. I asked whether if her life would be at risk or endangered and he couldn't even give me a proper answer. Well, all i can do now is to continue prayin for her. I'll be leavin you with a verse from the bible which really means something to me.

"Is any one of you in trouble? He should pray. Is anyone happy? Let him sing songs of praise. Is any one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick well; the Lord will raise him up. If he sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective."
James 5:13-16

2005-04-16T07:10:00.000+08:00

Hello peeps, this is my 2nd entry. Shut Up! I know what you are thinkin'. Sorrie lah, haven't got much time to post an entry. Okie. Where were we the last time? Hmm... Before that, today i went to school for Matriculation Day. Thanks to Jocelyn 'n' Yien's great idea, i managed to go through it with much ease. A BIG thanks to them! *Clap clap clap* Well, went to ngee ann with my best friend, Kim. We met up for breakfast at Mac first. (Dun bother asking what i had cuz that's besides the point.) Aniwaes, while we were eating, we suddenly remembered that we didn't know how to get to Ngee Ann. So that's when we started panickin'... Like how dumb is that right? Then thanks to my brilliant idea, i decided to sms my friends. Must remember. 154!
Okay, so we happily went there. We reached pretty early 'n' just went straight in lor. Scary sia, the place was crowded. -_-" Then we guai guai go 'n' join the queue. So we followed the current 'n' b4 we knew it, everything's settled. Then met Michelle and Jasmine on the way and we continued with them. Oh ya! I've decided to get the "Acer Laptop TravelMate 3202Xci". I fell in love with it the moment i saw it. Wanted to pay the down payment on the spot but realised that i dun have enough cash with me. $100 deposit leh. I mean we are students right? I only have $50 with me then. This shows that i need a card ASAP!! Spent quite some time there. Wanted to borrow from my friend, Jasmine, but then the ATM machine broke down! Like how SUAY is that lah? Then called my parents 'n' related the whole thing to them. Then we finally concluded that it's more appropriate to get the laptop online. Total waste of time right??
Aniwaes, I signed up for the bA - Freshman Camp 2005. Only $12. Well, it's $8 cheaper then the FOC camp. Kim was like goin' on 'n' on bout what she could do with the $8 if she saved it. -_-" Then met a few other friends there. Saw Xiang Xiang 'n' Elson. They came together 'n' so we made fun of them. Actually i made fun of them most of the tym lah. After a long 'n' tiring day, I came back home 'n' died on my bed... So until next tym peeps! Buai!

2005-03-31T09:24:00.000+08:00

Hello EvErYoNe! Ahem Ahem. *drinkx water* To start the ball rolling. I'm proud to present this blog to all you ppl out there. Okay, i better stop crapping. Well, up to date, i suppose this is the 3rd time i started a blog. Muahaha. (dun bother asking me what happened to the other 2, i consider them failures.) Well i suppose that's cuz i fail to keep it updated lah. Haha. Aniwaes, so i told myself if i were to start on new blog, i had better keep it updated, or at least ppost something here once or twice a week if i'm not free. So here i am with this new blog.

Okay, to start off, i suppose you guys would wanna know where in the world am I right? I'm stayin' in Singapore!! Sorrie... that was a stupid answer. Well... I'm currently posted to Ngee Ann Poly, and will be studying Accountancy there. Didn't really do well for my 'O's. My L1R5 was 18 after CCA deduction. Kinda sad lah. But what's done is done. I've really gotta thank God for putting me in that area and not placing me in Optometry (2nd choice) cuz i dun even like it. Dun ask why. Long story. Yup! So now i am happily waiting for term to start so i can PIAH all the way! Make it to NTU or something 'n' come out to be an accountant! *imagines himself as an accountant* Yup yup!

Hmm... Me pretty active in church. *smilez* I'm in Follow-Up Committee. Basically we follow-up on new converts. It's a very interestin' job lah. I play the piano and am a support singer *starts singin'* for my churchs' youth group known as the Youth Zone (YZ). I am discipling a group of boys too. and also discipled by my Disciple Group leader (DGL), Jian Horng. In another words, i am a DGL too! Haha. Okay. I think that's enough crap about me for the day. Till next time earthlings! Here's Lance signing out!